


Bloody Hell

by cerezsis



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Blood, Female Friendship, Gen, Light-Hearted, Male-Female Friendship, Menstruation, Season/Series 11, TARDIS Rooms, managed to sneak in a reference to River because I'm trash, probably takes place between The Tsuranga Conundrum and Demons of the Punjab
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-01
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-13 22:00:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29782710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cerezsis/pseuds/cerezsis
Summary: The Doctor gets her period for the first time and is quite upset about it.
Relationships: Thirteenth Doctor & The Doctor's TARDIS, Thirteenth Doctor & Yasmin Khan, Thirteenth Doctor & Yasmin Khan & Graham O'Brien & Ryan Sinclair, Yasmin Khan & Graham O'Brien & Ryan Sinclair
Comments: 2
Kudos: 21





	Bloody Hell

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this as a sort of vent piece. Didn’t pull any punches, so click away if you’re squeamish.

There was always a brief adjustment period whenever the Doctor got a new body. Usually, it was only a matter of a day or two before they got settled in, figured out all the odds and ends, and went back to life as usual. However, this time around, it seemed there were still a few more surprises waiting.

The Doctor had been feeling mild pains for the past day, namely in her lower back and pelvic area. It didn’t raise any suspicions, as her last adventure ended with a tumble down a rocky cliffside, so lingering pain was to be expected. Still, it was annoying enough for her to seek relief in the form of one of the TARDIS’s many jacuzzi tubs.

“A nice soak oughta do the trick,” she said to herself as she filled the tub with warm water and bubbles. The bathroom she was in was brand new, or at least one the TARDIS hadn’t shown her before. The walls were lined with rustic stones, and a chandelier hung from the wood ceiling. The tub itself sat in the center of a dark marble slab and overlooked an archway that led to an artificial outdoor area, complete with a sky with a permanent sunset and a gorgeous waterfall. All in all, very nice, very relaxing.

Shrugging off her braces, the Doctor allowed her trousers to fall to her ankles, and she kicked them a short distance away. Next off were her shirts, tossed in a heap along with her trousers. She then pulled down her knickers, but before she could kick them away, she saw something that made her breath hitch.

“Ohhhh, that’s blood,” she said, her voice laced with confusion and alarm as she searched her mind for an explanation, “Why am I bleeding from-!” Suddenly, it hit her. The feeling of alarm left as quickly as it arrived, but there remained a lingering unease. “Oh… right… I have a uterus now. That’s supposed to happen.” She took a moment to adjust to this. This was fine, just a perfectly normal function of her anatomy. Still, it was new, and, quite honestly, intimidating.

“Ok… it’s fine,” she told herself, “Billions of lifeforms manage this. You’ll get used to it… eventually.” Bending down to pick up her blood-stained underwear, she found herself grumbling. “Did it have to start _today_ , though? I quite liked this pair. They have _otters_ on them!”

Sighing, she went over to the dark marble sink and let it fill with cold water. She might not have experienced menstruation before, but with the lifestyle she led, she knew a thing or two about removing blood stains.

As she plunged the knickers into the water, the feeling of something running down her leg reminded her that she was still, in fact, bleeding.

“Right… need to do something about that… sanitary products… those are stored in bathrooms, right?” She glanced around, a cold panic running through her veins as she realized she had no idea if there were even any on the ship. Her past companions never mentioned needing them, but then again, they might not have felt comfortable talking about that stuff around her when she was a man. Humans, at least, typically preferred to discuss such things with fellow people who menstruate.

“Ok, don’t panic,” she reminded herself, “You’re just in the TARDIS, not anywhere public. You’re _home…_ and so are your mates… and you’re stuck, half naked and having your period for the first time… Not doing great on the not panicking bit.”

Her eyes darted around, landing on a cupboard next to the sink. Hurriedly opening its doors, she let out an elated sigh when she saw it stocked with various pads and tampons.

“Good TARDIS!”

She studied the boxes, trying to decide what she should start with. She still wanted that bath, so logically, tampons were the best choice, right? Reaching for one of the brightly colored boxes, she quickly noticed a discrepancy among them.

“Why are there different sizes? How am I supposed to know which one to use?” She studied the box in her hand, quickly spotting a chart on the side. Apparently, the size needed depended on how heavy one’s flow was. “Well, how am I supposed to know that? I’ve only just started!”

She pulled out another box, the next size up from the one she was already holding. Studying the packaging, she tried to determine just how different the “regular” and “super” sizes were.

“I should start with the smaller one, right? That’s how it usually works. Start small and move up a size if you have to?”

She put the larger size back and opened the box of “regular” tampons. As she reached into the box, it occurred to her that she didn’t really know how they work. She was about to let out a groan, when she noticed a folded-up pamphlet in between the bright green wrappers. Curious, she took it out and examined it.

“Instructions! Very thoughtful!”

She quickly began studying the pamphlet, carefully examining the text and diagrams. Once she felt she had a good enough understanding, she went to the toilet to get it done. It wasn’t as easy as she thought, and when she removed the applicator, she was surprised by the amount of blood on her hand.

“If any other body part bled this much, it would be really concerning,” she mused. She stood up, intending to dispose of the wrapper and applicator, but as soon as she did, something felt… off. Figuring this wasn’t right, she looked back at the instructions, hoping to find answers.

_If inserted correctly, you shouldn’t be able to feel it. If it feels uncomfortable, remove it and try again with a new one._

The Doctor sighed. “So much work!” Resigning herself to the defeat, she took another one from the box.

\--

The Fam awoke that morning to the sound of metal slamming metal. Emerging from their rooms, the three of them shared a confused glance before following the sound. Quickly arriving at the control room, they found the Doctor repeatedly hitting the console with a wrench. Another glance was shared, this time with hints of concern. From the look of things, she seemed to have started out doing maintenance, but it eventually led to the scene in front of them.

“Everything alright, Doc?” Graham asked.

The Doctor looked up, pausing mid-swing.

“It’s been a bad day.”

“It’s 9am,” Yaz pointed out.

The Doctor shrugged, before tossing the wrench to the ground. The others eyed her, both with suspicion and concern. In the few weeks they’ve known her, they rarely saw her outside of a chipper mood, much less angry.

“You gonna tell us what’s up, or are ya gonna break more of the ship?” Ryan asked, hoping a joke would lighten the mood.

The Doctor huffed, throwing her hands in the air before making her way to the other side of the console.

“First off, I started menstruating last night, and I gotta say, not a fan!” she informed them, irritation heavy in her voice. Yaz nodded in sympathy, but the guys immediately wished they’d stayed in their rooms.

“I knew it was coming sooner or later, but I was expecting it to be _later!”_ she continued, “Thought it’d be _at least_ a few months before it got started!”

“Wait, hang on-” Yaz interjected, “ _Months?_ ”

“Yes,” the Doctor nodded, “My species doesn’t menstruate as often as humans. One to three times a year is the norm.”

“Lucky.”

“No, _not_ lucky! Lucky would be _this_ not happening! Lucky would be evolution finding a more efficient way to shed the uterine lining! This is _incredibly_ inconvenient! And _messy!_ Why does so much blood-!”

“Ok, I’m out,” Ryan said, turning around.

“Yeah, I, uh…” Graham said, starting to follow him, “… I’m booked solid today, Doc. Good luck with… that.”

Yaz rolled her eyes as they walked away. “Seriously? We’re all adults here!”

The Doctor didn’t seem to pay their exit any mind. “How do humans put up with this happening so _often?_ I’ve traveled with _many_ humans with active menstrual cycles, but none of them quite let on just how _miserable_ this is! Well, River gave me an earful, but even then, I had no idea it was like _this!_ The cramps are awful, the mess is awful, and I feel like I could eat my entire chocolate stash in one sitting!”

“Well, chocolate helps, but yeah, don’t do that,” the younger woman advised. She felt for her friend, she really did, but it was really refreshing, the Doctor having a normal problem for once. One that Yaz could relate to.

The Time Lord huffed, before turning back to the console. As she studied the damage, her expression changed from irritation to remorse. “I’m gonna need a few days to fix this…”

“Why were you hitting it, anyway?”

“I got zapped by a wire, and it upset me,” she explained, “Then I dropped the wrench, and when I went to stand back up, I hit my head on the console.”

“So you hit it with the wrench?”

The Doctor shrugged. “Made sense at the time.”

**Author's Note:**

> If you're able to, please consider supporting my Patreon. Every little bit is appreciated, and helps me continue to focus on writing and to bring these stories to you! 😁❤ https://www.patreon.com/cerezsis


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